Mommy Love

If you know me well, you know how close I was with my mum. Mid last month, she was admitted in the hospital for a minor thing but suddenly she blacked out and by the time the doctors came she was already 'not breathing'. Yes, live coverage via Twitter, you're welcome. Mom fainted all the time so I thought this was one of the 'she-would-wake-up-in-two-minutes' thing. Unfortunately, she was in a coma and was on life support. Something about there was not enough oxygen supply to the brain when she fainted. We were at the hospital, part of me blame the staffs for taking their own sweet time doing everything.

After 27 days on life support and unconscious, she passed away in Dad's arms on 14-Feb-2012. I was not there, no one was there except Dad.

I was more of a wreck the first few days she was on life support, than when she passed away. I thank God for giving me a 3 and a half week 'heads-up' before He took her. I dont think I could take it if she suddenly 'went'. I had many days to prepare myself for the worse, I had many days to pray for her, to apologize, to tell her I love her and to tell her I got a job.

Unfortunately, my mother will not be there for my graduation ceremony, my wedding, when I first give birth or when I buy my first house, but I believe in everything happens for a reason and God has better plans for me. I am thankful I had 22 wonderful years with her.

I think of her everyday, every second. I love her so so much but God loves her more so who am I to fight with Him, no?

Thank you to all me relatives and friends that was there for me throughout the whole thing. I really appreciate it.

Mommy, I love you. You're in a better place and I hope you're doing awesome, where ever you are.

Al-fatihah.